She Didn't Want To Do It, So End Of Story.

Rape. 



That word is heavily charged; a sort of trigger-word.  It’s been my experience that many people have one scenario for rape-a woman, conscious, being forced by a man.  There are many different scenarios and circumstances regarding rape, some people consider these “gray areas” of rape.  For example, there are court cases where the accused is not convicted due to various reasons.  The victim was perhaps intoxicated and unable to give consent.  There are those that personally believe that that does not constitute rape.  Perhaps the victim agreed initially but later said no.  Some people do not count that as rape.  Sometimes it even comes down to what the victim was wearing or how they were behaving, as if that made her consent irrelevant. 

I do not presume to speak for anybody regarding their experience, because surely every situation is different and each person is unique.  There are people that would argue with me that even though I was too inebriated to give consent, that was my own fault, I set myself up for my particular situation, and I should have prevented it.  The Pennsylvania Liquor Control Board recently displayed ads targeting young people to be conscious about their alcohol consumption.  One of these ads has a young woman on the bathroom floor with her boyshorts around her ankles, with the text “She didn’t want to do it, but she couldn’t say no”.

 A huge backlash erupted from victims and the PLCB was forced to withdraw the particular ad, but only after they realized that it “made them feel victimized all over again”.  It’s important to be aware of how often victims are made to feel at fault for rape.  Not only is this placing blame on the victim, but the victim’s friends-it is your fault if your friend is raped at a party.  It does not matter how a person dresses or acts in regards to rape-the only thing that should matter is clear, legal consent.  There certainly are male rape victims, but women are disproportionately victimized for this particular crime.  It is just another interesting aspect in the differences that sex or gender makes in your life in that gender kaleidoscope we so often talk about.


http://thinkprogress.org/justice/2011/12/09/386110/pennsylvania-liquor-control-board-pulls-ad-that-blames-women-for-getting-date-raped/?mobile=nc